The Kankonian calendar

A year on Kankonia lasts as long as 334.2135 days on Earth. The planet revolves around its sun 360.42820 times in a year. The calendar of Kankonia, introduced by Ekhula and invented by his astronomers, fits 360 days neatly into 12 months, 30 per month. There is a rough correspondence between the length of a month and the phases of Akalla (which completes a cycle every 27.5904 days), but Kankonians prefer to base their month mathematically on what makes a clean 12 x 30 division. Tziran is even rougher in relation to months, going through 17.53 phases a year.

A date is known simply as, say, 25-10-3859, or 25 in 10 in 3859. The months are identified as Drert Zash In (or Month that Is 1), Drert Zash Bam (or Month that Is 2) and so on, up to Drert Zash Zanbam.

The first, third and sixth years of each seven-year cycle (1, 3, 6, 8, 10, 13, 15, 17, 20, 22 . . .) have an extra day at the end of the year, so that 30-12 is followed by 31-12. Every 2,700 years starting from the year 1, Kankonians skip the date 31-12 on the year that is a multiple of 2,700 (like 5400 or 8100), and skip it on the next would-be leap year if the multiple of 2,700 is not a leap year (so there is no 31-12 in 2701, the next would-be leap year after 2700).

The calendar begins on the first day of spring in the southern hemisphere. The year 0 on the Kankonian calendar began on 1-1-0, at 9:07:45 p.m. on September 30, 7215 B.C. on Earth. Years before the calendar began are identified as -1, -2, -3 and so on, so 15-3 of 250 years before the Kankonian calendar begins would be 15-3--250.

One day consists of 16 lamas, one lami consists of 64 kinkiles, and one kinkil consists of 64 imas. An imis can be further divided into a thousand tithiimas, a million nishimas, a billion vilimas and a trillion berlidimas.

16:00 is midnight, and 8:00 noon. The 16 time zones are arranged so that midnight in Hetziel (Hegheos) is noon in Kapikaimi (Povoi) and vice versa. Kankonians spend every kyuzidil, or day of the month divisible by five (5-1, 10-1, 15-1, 20-1, 25-1, 30-1, 5-2, and so on), off from most jobs and from studying, in addition to spending 31-12 off. The spas is generally understood as 5 consecutive days from a day after a day divisible by five to a day divisible by five, and occasionally to 6 consecutive days (from 26-12 to 31-12). Days 1, 6, 11, 16, 21 and 26 of a month are known as inpyesdekh (one-modulus); days 2, 7, 12, 17, 22 and 27 as bampyesdekh (two-modulus); days 3, 8, 13, 18, 23 and 28 as empyesdekh (three-modulus); and days 4, 9, 14, 19, 24 and 29 are holpyesdekh (four-modulus). Day names do not work the same as the seven days of the week on Earth calendars, however, as days 30 and 31 are both considered kyuzidil, and day 13, for instance, is always considered empyesdekh.

Kankonian holidays

1-1 is New Year's Day. This is celebrated by the planting of palm trees across Kankonia, especially species that will sprout soon in the spring. Young people climb palm trees and bring down coconuts to make coconut milk. This coconut milk is often made into a Povoian cake called a uesheuvi, featuring maize flour, custard and a caramel glaze. At Fasukum, a parade is held, and at 16:01 on 1-1, the Fasukum Vault is opened. This is a giant vault that is open for the new year, a blank page. Fireworks are thrown as the calendar turns over from 30-12 or 31-12 to 1-1.

13-3 is Beggars' Day. People prepare food for the beggars as the latter come to their houses. The beggars walk neighborhoods and say "Garaks shkapaks, mahan is ad seshui elas kabaks?" (Garaks shkapaks, may I scrabble for some food?) at each door. People do not usually give the beggars elaborate meals, but being stingy is frowned upon. A popular giveaway is the beggar's potato (*uyub na therlot), a bumpy red cultivar of potato. During the weekend of 10-3 (starting when work gets off at 9-3), grocery stores give away free uti sacks to the beggars to stuff all their goodies in.

On 14-4 Kankonians celebrate Space Awareness Day, with telescopes and interplanetary trips. Stores put up images of telescopes, spacecraft, rockets, planets, comets and asteroids. For many Kankonians, this is the one day a year they visit another planet. Trips to Schaza, Shaleya, Junsu and Shanu are popular, as to a lesser extent are zhoar (nonhuman sapient) planets like Javarti, Chatony, Mensinghi and Keitel. Schools have this day off, but take other days this week to teach about astronomy.

2-7 is Shelkan's Birthday. Kankonians read speeches by Shelkan, the khemehekis rebel leader. They also burn effigies of Emperor Phoriphio. Many Kankonians dress up like Shelkan (with felt hat, plaid shirt, shorts, sandals and Shelkan mask) or Kerina (with long hair, plaid shirt, vest, suspenders, khakis, sandals and Kerina mask).

12-7 is Kankonia Day, a celebration of the ecological conservation of Kankonia. Hundreds of Kankonians in each city go to a teach-in about the history of environmentalism and how ecologically unsanitary practices such as the use of CFC's came and went. Many wear green-and-blue-striped polos on this day, representing the verdure and water of the planet. Trees are planted and endangered animals "adopted". The BAK is always aggressive against loggers, but if they catch a logger cutting down a tree in a rain-forest on Kankonia Day, they will shoot on sight.

25-8 is Anarchy Day. As this is a kyuzidil, there is never school on Anarchy Day. Citizens celebrate the establishment of thelemarchy on Kankonia with feasts of squid, cod, pimplefish, scallops, peppers, poppy rolls, sasoks and wine. They also throw fireworks and smoke marijuana. Stores put trapezoid stickers in their windows. Many brave Kankonians will take trips to countries like Kebsabhaz and Danton and stick their tongues out at the natives. It is also a tradition on Anarchy Day for men to dress up as women (with breasts) and women to dress up as men (with facial hair).

8-9 is Tzalath Day, the date the Tzalath was completed. This is recognized by Hazumis, Rasaphis and Musefis alike. People buy new copies of their Tzalaths to replace those that have worn out. Most temples from the Tzalathic religions have readings of the most enduring parts of the Tzalath.

Finally, 31-12 is Long Day, the intercalary day on the end of leap years. This is celebrated by releasing 361 butterflies that have been raised in captivity from caterpillars into the wild in most major cities across the planet. People who live in suburbs drive down to the city the day before to watch the butterflies being released. Since this a popular time for hotels and tourists, hotels drop their prices and many businesses advertise at hotels. Various kinds of liqueur are also drunk on Long Day.

Moveable dates include Pheludzar, the date Hetenemphra came up with Musefism, and Lekh Daserim, the date Rasaphism was founded.

The Ciladian calendar

Ciladia's calendar was adapted from that of Amadia, with the months renamed. It fit 13 months into 360 days. The 13 months were:

  • 1 Syedun (28 days)
  • 2 Aphar (27 days)
  • 3 Kyeb (28 days)
  • 4 Narekar (28 days)
  • 5 Madun (27 days)
  • 6 Shebhat (28 days)
  • 7 Nugesh (29 days)
  • 8 Uphar (27 days)
  • 9 Phemun (28 days)
  • 10 Byabh (27 days)
  • 11 Adem (28 days)
  • 12 Dyukhalel (27 days)
  • 13 Bhetash (28 days)

    On the second, fourth and sixth years of each seven-year cycle counting from the year 1, Adem would have a twenty-ninth day, called Phegim, or "Stop Day".

    Years starting from 1 are called Iph Pemakh (I.P.), or "after the mission", while years before 1 I.P. are labeled Dan Pemakh (D.P.), or "before the mission". The calendar began with Syedun 1, 1 I.P., on 15-10--2551 by the Ekhulic calendar. The use of D.P. and I.P. is a holdover from the Amadian calendar, which started with the announcement of the mission to settle Amadia.

    The Phesandran calendar

    Phesandra's calendar was based on 13 months:

  • 1 Dzobhwa (28 days)
  • 2 Yanter (27 days)
  • 3 Phanfed (28 days)
  • 4 Khutra (27 days)
  • 5 Bhetra (28 days)
  • 6 Swiphar (28 days)
  • 7 Pahenta (27 days)
  • 8 Byufi (28 days)
  • 9 Phyopiri (27 days)
  • 10 Mitri (28 days)
  • 11 Syndri (27 days)
  • 12 Bhamba (28 days)
  • 13 Hykres (27 days)

    Every 11 years starting with the year 11, an intercalary month of 27 days, Kehyd, was added after Hykres.

    Years starting from 1 are called Rophi Hempa (R.H.), or "Year of Man". Years before 1 R.H. are called Sakha Enkhybi (S.E.), or "before the establishment", i.e. the establishment of the calendar. The calendar began with 1 Dzobhwa, 1 R.H., on 14-5--1244 by the Ekhulic calendar. It is known that the Phesandrans had already had their country for a few decades when its calendar was created in 1 R.H.

    The Povoian calendar

    The Ancient Povoians developed their own calendar. It was a lunar calendar, with the first day of each month being a full moon (Akalla). A standard year had 13 months of 27 or 28 days each:

  • 1 Doiga
  • 2 Nepi
  • 3 Ratausha
  • 4 Kati
  • 5 Fökois
  • 6 Götra
  • 7 Vuatauv
  • 8 Noishu
  • 9 Zeramai
  • 10 Repros
  • 11 Kavrait
  • 12 Mapua
  • 13 Aumöbo

    Each of the 27 or 28 days of a month is named after an animal:

  • 1 Moiti
  • 2 Uabangu
  • 3 Bedro
  • 4 Pumesha
  • 5 Söga
  • 6 Aininga
  • 7 Tapi
  • 8 Oiki
  • 9 Vaikas
  • 10 Gemas
  • 11 Tengut
  • 12 Duani
  • 13 Shauvi
  • 14 Pauti
  • 15 Zöba
  • 16 Böpi
  • 17 Torpu
  • 18 Engut
  • 19 Pira
  • 20 Sotepaina
  • 21 Braimas
  • 22 Guadra
  • 23 Otisuami
  • 24 Avanassa
  • 25 Suiva
  • 26 Pashav
  • 27 Gabobru
  • 28 Tezri

    Days were possessives of months, which in turn were possessives of years, so the ninth day of Mapua in the year 234 would be expressed as 234-si Mapuasi Vaikas.

    Every 16 years starting in the year 16, an intercalary month, Pengua, is added between Kati and Fökois, and the year has 14 months. Each 16 years from 1 to 16, from 17 to 32, from 33 to 48, etc., form one cycle (raumu in Povoian).

    Every 1,024 years starting in the year 1024, a second intercalary month, Maisso, is added between Zeramai and Repros, and the year has 15 months. Each 1,024 years form one possa (the Povoian word for eon).

    The year 1, with Doigasi Moiti, was dated so that it began on 17-4--763 by Ekhula's calendar. The Povoian calendar was actually invented in the year 280 by Povoian standards, or -483 using Ekhula's calendar.

    The Povoians believed in a form of astrology based on the day of a month in which a person was born. A person born on Pauti, the day of the tapir, for instance, was believed to have the characteristics of a tapir.

  • Moiti (elephant), friendly, pious, loves to eat
  • Uabangu (uabangu), big, scrappy, hot-tempered, conservative
  • Bedro (pig) eager, willing to try anything, a backstabber
  • Pumesha (duck), talkative, sociable, petty
  • Söga (monkey), clever, sneaky, knows just what to do
  • Aininga (beetle), in tune with the past, the present and the future, wise, morbid
  • Tapi (tapi), open-minded, loose, the best athletes
  • Oiki (mouse), neat, compulsive, worries about everything
  • Vaikas (parrot), highly intelligent, hubristic, the type most prone to commit suicide
  • Gemas (bee), industrious, polite, unfaithful in bed, as sweet as honey
  • Tengut (deer), soft, washy, emotional, wants to "talk about our feelings"
  • Duani (cobra), crafty, sleek, sexy
  • Shauvi (alpaca), a gentleman or lady, helpful, a cut above the rest, stubborn
  • Pauti (tapir) a team player, fair, impersonal
  • Zöba (rabbit), gentle, faithful, always suspicious of others
  • Böpi (ant), unindividualistic, submissive, plays by the rules
  • Torpu (dog), happy, rustic, eager to please, enjoys gross-out humor
  • Engut (crab), salty, a good survivor, not loyal to anything
  • Pira (frog), musically gifted, goes to his/her own groove, dirty (it does eat flies, after all)
  • Sotepaina (chicken, or wild jungle fowl), showy, fun-loving, the best people in business
  • Braimas (pomba), concupiscent, unconventional
  • Guadra (python), uninhibited, powerful, deadly in relationships
  • Otisuami (snail), mopey, ridden with woe, kind-hearted
  • Avanassa (avanassa), moody, artistic
  • Suiva (shark), noble, swift, can get angry easily
  • Pashav (sheep), reliable, minds his/her own business, not a team player
  • Gabobru (goat), wise, rough, wins every debate
  • Tezri (dragon), inwardly drawn, spiritual, untameable, special

    These traits were least pronounced and more spread out among adjacent years in a person born in year 1 of each cycle, so that a Uabangu born in the year 17 had many of the traits of the adjoining Moiti and Bedro, but they became stronger with each passing year, until in year 16 of the cycle, the traits were at their most prominent, so a Uabangu born in the year 32 would be very hot-tempered indeed!

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    This page courtesy of James E. F. Landau. Write to him here.